thank you friends

 

 

friends..

turns out whatever i had came out of my butt for only one day!!

 

there was something wicked in there though causing grade A inferno level cramps.

but let me tell you something about something..

 

this shit right here...

made me feel like a new person.

it is loaded with potassium and i swear to god when you shit your insides out you need to replace things proper like.

this will do it.

 

keep it on hand people.

for serious.

 

 

 

 

 

 

happy days.

 

 

 

 

 

i slept with cat diarrhea so let's talk about spriiiing!!!!! (and diarrhea)

yeah it's true.  right by my face.

but thankfully due to the fact that i can't breathe, i was unaware.

see?

every cloud does have a silver lining!!

even a flu cloud has double rainbow potential.

and bc i hate to have you all wondering all day why there was cat diarrhea in the first place,

i will gift you with the details..

 

nicolas, my older cat

(who's forces aren't so strong today unless you mean from the butt strong in which case they have crime fighting potential)

was constipated.

big time.

took him to the vet this morning to have everything checked out.

we were concerned about kidney failure.

thankfully his kidney's are fine.

just constipated.

he has some protein issues but all of this is treatable.

YAY!

i won't lose another cat anytime soon!!!!

so he had not one enema..but TWO enemas!!

i wasn't there bc i am still sick, so mike had to endure month old poop smell. 

we are all breathing a (stinky) sigh of relief..

well, not me...i can't smell anything..

which will come in handy when i am cleaning up mineral oil and poop water all over the house today.

 

so i figure with all this good news it seems only fitting to tie it into spring.

the one thing i think the entire country is in agreement on..

 

so wrap your mind around the fact that spring is only 39 days away..

 

 

 

 

helltothemotherfuckinyeah!!

 

images via house and garden and house beautiful

reader question: need your input

that sounded like a cry for help.

sorry...been dealing with a constipated 6 year old and a very sick cat all weekend. 

fiona's butt is on vapo-lock.

(taking suggestions unless your suggestions are miralax, prunes, prune juice, enema's and finger up the butt..bc i have tried all of those to no avail- am open to beatings)

anyway..

a loyal and faithful reader who has a beautiful house she did up all by herself has a very good question she wants our input on...

 

Hi,

 

I have a topic I'd love to hear discussion on - kids in houses. We just had grandsons, 3 and 7, for a few days in my newly reno'd digs and they were way more rambunctious than I ever remember my twin heathen girls and their sedate older bro being when they were tots. Then I read Lamp's comment about squashing the velvet on account of her babe.

 

What I'm questioning is at what point am I OCD when anxiety wipes me out when the kids are running through my house, climbing over the furniture (including my blue velvet chairs), pressing grubby fingers and noses against glass,TOUCHING everything and dropping shit on my rift-sawn white oak natural finish (i.e. not inexpensive) flooring? It's already been established that I'm not to be a disciplinarian as it may hurt my hubs' son's feelings.

 (reader's house)

Soooo, where do today's parents who care about design and how their homes present stand on kidos in homes? I want the kids to enjoy visiting us, but I designed my house (mostly, I guess) for my husband and I, plus adult friends, to enjoy. I have statuario extra marble island counter top (with full waterfall edges - another finish that was not inexpensive) that I'm constantly on apple juice patrol over. Am I too uptight? Am I wrong? Is there a stick I need to pull out of my ass?

 

I know it's boring shit, but I'd love to hear what your readers have to say on the subject if you have occasion to bring it up.  

 

Thanks and thanks just the same if you're not so inclined!

 

Warm regards,

 

mm


my first reaction is to tell son in law to control his kids.

this is your house, not theirs. they are visitors no matter what.

yes, they are children..but i am hoping that your son is telling his kids to be cool around nana's nice things..

they need to respect that.  kids or not.

however...kids are clumsy by nature and boys are crazy and rambunctious by nature, so maybe it wouldn't hurt to cover up those velvet chairs for their visits..maybe no shoes in the house when they visit..and as for the fingerprints?? well, that's easy to remedy once they're gone.

as for your anxiety and nerves...do what i would do...

when they visit fill an IV with a nice carmenere or syrah and hook that shit directly into your veins..

 

 

what advice can you give?

***poop updates:  fiona came home from school and dropped off 4 baked potatoes.