gather round..swishers and bleeders..

bet you thought this was an AHS recap.

it isn't.

that's coming though.

first i thought i would update you on swishing..


i haven't swished in 4 days.

my doctor told me to hold back a bit..

since i was feeling so bad.

he recommended i do it every other day.

and i did.

bc i was.

feeling reeeeal bad.

tired beyond what is acceptable.

fever that caused aches.

panic attacks that caused murder thoughts toward my loved ones.

i was unable to leave the house on some days bc i hurt so bad.

and then i would get really sad and start sobbing as if i was listening to a joni mitchell song while reading the bell jar.

and throughout the 4 days off the symptoms persisted.

i debated (still debate) on whether or not i have the flu..

but there is no stuffy nose, no coughs, no runny nose, no poops, no pukes etc..

nothing but terrible malaise.

like the worst hangover of your life.

last night the headache of all headaches started.

and as i write this i am shaking with pain in my brain.

i NEVER get headaches..

maybe once a year.


and then this morning i woke up to this:



i have questions.

mostly my older lady readers are going to be able to answer them for me.


did this detox cause the worst pms of my life?

am i just in the beginnings of the change?

and does the change cause me to feel like i want to seriously murder everyone?

i mean i know pms can make you crazy, but crazy AND feel like i am dying?


the thing is this..

i KNOW detoxes can bring out some nasty shit.

i KNOW some people are more susceptible to these effects based on their immune systems.

being a type 1 diabetic my immune system is probably a little slower than yours.

while doing a detox your body can 'grab a virus' in order to facilitate the elimination of the toxins.

but yet, nothing was coming out of me.

no snot, no diarrhea, no puke...all effective ways to eliminate the toxins.

and yet, all of my symptoms sound exactly like the herx symptoms.



speak up my ladies.

i need your experience here.


and if you're in your 20's pass this around to your moms.



i love you all.

i hate you.

i love you.

i hate you.