so lame and stuff

a coupla things..

i have been feeling a bit of a disconnect with my blog and my readers lately.

and dear lord other bloggers as well..

i used to go through that whole list over there and read each and every blog, every day.

now i am lucky if i get to read 3. 

sorry bloggers, if you feel i have been neglecting you, you are right.

i will try to be better.


(lame person but also slightly awesome)


and a lot of my readers leave comments and ask me questions and i never answer them bc i just don't seem to have the time.

i hate myself for that.


(lame woman child)

i have a L O N G list of emails that have gone unanswered.

i have a dirty house too.

for those of you who know me well, you must think that is preposterous.

trust me it isn't.


(so much of this is lame)


i'll bet when gwyneth gets overwhelmed by gardening, cooking, cleaning, tracy anderson methoding, mothering, singing, acting, dancing, chris martin beej's, and travelling she has people to help her out.  


don't get me wrong, i am happier and more satisfied with myself than i have been in a long time.

it feels good to bring a bit of money to the table for a job that i love doing.

i love helping people make their houses prettier. 

i love reaching out and (hopefully) making people laugh with this blog.

i love the prospect of writing a book.


i don't love feeling like everything is out of balance.

i stare at those french doors, one of them painted over like a WWII bomb shelter,  every day and think...holy shit i need to finish those...when am i going to have time to finish those!?!?!

there is laundry at the bottom of the laundry basket that has shit growing on it bc it's been at the bottom for so long.

my kid watches too much tv bc my face is jammed into the computer's butt crack.



the point is i am super busy, yo!

busier than ever.

busy busy busy.

busy phillips...


(lame lesbian)


and i am trying to find balance.

i don't want to give anything up.

i want to make it all work.

 none of this is HARD, so to speak..i mean i don't feel like i can't do any of it.

it's the balance i seek.


i am sure in time i will find a rythym. 

this is all so new to me.


how do you all do it?

what are the tricks you have learned?

help me to remain cool and awesome.

and not become douchey.