stupid ankles post disguised with pretty pictures

 my ankles feel like what that guy's in misery felt like when kathy bates hobbled the fuck out of them.


(wall tassels are an interesting option)


all that tracy anderson bouncing is actually making my bones start to break.

oh..what's that you say?

your shoes suck?



yes.  they do.

but the problem is i have no idea what kind of shoes to get.

many people say that zumba workout shoes are the way to go.

btw- if you don't know what zumba is (i didn't either)-

it is some kind of stupid dance workout that you need coordination to achieve, and rythm.

2 things i lack a tremendous amount of.


(mini purple lampshades)


plus it looks like you are auditioning for an MTV dance show circa 'the grind'.

in other words you look like an asshole.

also it is more about dance moves and less about jumping and impact.

tracy is all about the jumping and the impact.

hence broken ankles.

(and you also look like an asshole. a stupid, jumping asshole)




so shoes.

i confess to maybe working out for 2 days in crocs to see if they were more cushiony than my nikes.



they were.



but they offered no support so my ankles hate life right now.



so what shoes do i get?


they are made for dance.

do i just get goop's shoes?

my fear is they are 300 dollars.

do i get some kind of hip hop dancey shoe with a padded high top ankle blanket?

do you give a fuck?

you have to give a fuck though.

bc my cardio will suffer which means that i cannot get super skinny and wine and reeses will win!

and you will have no superhero to look up to.

and then YOUR ass will get bigger!!


(lovely mix)


now get me some shoe facts!