shit i do on the inside to be better on the outside (and also inside)

so here we are on the 2nd installment of product week.


this portion is all about what i use to keep my body and brain, right and tight.


harder to do now that i am over 40.



i want to talk to the 20 year olds for a second here.

and the 30 year olds i guess too...

guys- if you don't work out and eat right you are setting yourself up for a fat attack when you reach 35.

possibly sooner, maybe later and definitely after you birth a human.

even you skinnies that don't have to do anything to be skinny.


and it will feel like a smack in the face.

you will wonder what happened to the days when you could eat an entire box of cereal, a cake, a bag of jelly beans, and a giant pumpkin chai latte twice a day and not gain weight.

when working out was something you did at the gym only on the weekends and think you were fit because of it.

well dummy, guess what?

you were/are fit because you have the metabolism of a race horse.

and that shit packs up and leaves you..slowly...over the course of your 30's and into your death.



there is help in that department...

don't get me wrong i am not advocating eating garbage and then taking this to speed up your metabolism.

working out will also become detrimental to your sanity once your periods start to wreak havoc and your mood swings start to make you a completely different person..

but this stuff really does help speed up your metabolism and burn fat while doing nothing.


i am talking about my beloved apple cider vinegar of course..



1 tsp to 1 tbsp in 8 oz of water 1 to 3 times a day.

it has helped me to lose that last bit of pudge (about 10 lbs) that i could not shake after having a baby.

i will never give it up.

it also helps with indegestion and upset stomach.

it's also great great great if you are coming down with a cold.

it's pretty amazing.


however, it MUST be the liquid.

the pills aren't the same for the weight loss.

they may help with the immunity, but they don't take away the bloat.

and it MUST be the raw kind with 'the mother'.




the workout.

i have been working out off and on since my teens.

mostly off.

but i would go through spurts.

like, i would work out every other day/4 times a week or 5 times a week for like a month.

then i wouldn't work out for 3 months.

sound familiar?

and it would either be JUST walking, JUST running or JUST the newest workout fad.

i was never smart about working out and i always worked out to be skinnier or in better physical shape.

and like everyone else i wanted immediate results and of course i never got them so i gave up.


let me now explain to you what took me years and years and years to figure out.


1. do NOT work out to look good.  well, i mean..DO....just have it be the OTHER reason you work out.


2. the PRIMARY reason i work out now is bc it FEELS good, it calms me and it disciplines me.


3. find the right workout for you.  and pick alternates.

for example..

do not just run.

run and do some muscular structure work that varies every day.

this could be weights, yoga, cross fit, krav maga whatever.

(i do not advocate krav maga simply bc saying the words 'krav maga' makes me want to remove my spleen and step on it)



4. eat less food.

boy oh boy this was/is hard.

but once i managed to figure it out and align myself with it..

it was easy to do.

i basically it.

i stop eating when i mentally know i have had enough.

bc sometimes the physical can lie to you.

in other words your body won't know it's full until you give it a chance to feel the digestion at work.

if you feel full before you mentally know you've had enough you have probably stuffed yourself.

never ever stuff yourself.




i hate cardio workouts.  i don't do them.

 i sweat with my workouts so i am getting some amazing exercise.

i just don't like to bounce.

my boobs do not like it.

and neither does my omnipod attached to my belly.

if you like this, then good for you!

do it!!  

bc cardio is a fat burner and if you are an over eater then cardio is your best friend.

even though over eating is wreaking havoc on your metabolism.

but at least if you're doing cardio you are revving it back up.



6. be patient.

this is so important.

it can take years...YEARS to see the results you want but if you don't stick with it you won't see anything, especially your feet past your gut.


7. try to avoid becomming bored with your routines.


which brings me to MY ROUTINES!!


tracy is my personal trainer.


she has literally changed the shape of my body.

we still have a ways to go-

as in forever.

i know that the more i proceed with her program the closer and closer i get to looking a lot like that picture.

the program i use is metamorphosis for abcentric fatties.

there are 4 types.

click to find yours.


the key to this workout is it changes every 10 days.

you get a new workout dvd every month.

and no, i don't do them every single day.

really, i hate the process of working out.

it's the main reason i never go to a gym.

it's like another step in the process of working out.

you have to get dressed, look a little bit cute and i ain't got that time.

getting up and putting on a sports bra is all the effort i want to make pre-workout.


because the reality is..





which brings me to my OTHER workout..


this is way more of a mind workout than anything..

but it does work my body too.



i do kundalini yoga and chakra yoga.

best. thing. ever.


i swear by this woman...

maya fiennes.


truth is i wouldn't stick with tracy if i wasn't involved with maya.

she is my guru.


and yes, her yoga is easy bc you almost never leave your bottom. 

it is metally challenging and slightly physically challenging.

there is chanting and meditation and you might be embarrassed if people are present while you are doing it so do it when you can be alone.

i am over that part and don't give a shit who hears me chanting om namo guru dev namo.

even though mike makes fun of her dippy songs and sings them all day long.

but doing her yoga practices make me feel centered, grounded, calm, awake, alive and happy.

you must keep with it and do it a lot.

i could be better about it bc as it is i probably do maya 4 times a week and tracy 4 times a week.

as in i double up 1 day a week.

and there are days i don't do anything bc i don't have time.

but that is my standard.



this is the dvd i do most.



the other practices i do are actually on youtube and they are the chakra yoga videos.

i am particularly fond of the 6th chakra practice.



i am addicted to her practices.


i hope you all will give it a try.

don't judge it and don't judge yourself when you are doing it.

go with it and trust it.

keep at it.




some other things that keep me in check mentally are...



bach flower essences.

i won't go into how they work bc it's another blog post.

but if you don't know about them, you should.

for a quick education get this.

my go to's are:



cherry plum

white chestnut


 also great for kids.

fiona takes agrimony and larch




finally many of you may remember my poop issues (if you're new here..welcome to poop town. we talk about poop. i am the mayor.)

as soon as i started taking this regularly the poop issues went away almost completely..







that's it.


enjoy it. do it.

love it.

eat it.

drink it.

suck on it.