heather's central michagan craig (no one uses craigslist there aka my job was hard)

its another craig day for us all. "gird your loins". that's what heather said to me and she was right. central, northern, and grand rapids michigan's craiglist suck lemur balls.
it's not that there is a ton of crap to sift through, there just isn't a whole lot of anything. like 5 additions to the furniture category in 4 days. i managed to find a few things in her areas but i did venture to detroit just in case...detroit is no picnic either.
here's heather's letter to me:

"Dear MFAMB,

I have been diligently combing the list for a curvy french

chair and/or sofa. My craiglist is northwest Michigan region,

gird your loins.

Much love,

Heather"

let's begin...
(*michigan people like to jack the prices of their shit up...be warned. my advice is to always offer half. if they are stubborn and say- no way assfarter! just say ok thank you and bye. watch the item...in a week if it's still there...call back and ask again.)

love seat and chair- $220 this is a great shape and reasonable for both pieces.

beautifully carved french sofa- $585 it is quite unique and you could make it waaay cooler by covering it in a gorgeous nubby black linen and maybe gold leaf the wood. drool. sexballs.


french provincial sofa- $300 same advice as above. or go opposite with some white linen and silver leaf. but the possibilities are endless.

3 piece antique settee- $400 gorgeous.

french settee- $300 probs too small for your sofa purposes but happy in a bedroom or next to your dining room table. cover it in something durable and washable. oh and forgo the tufting. i love tufting but not on this piece. it's like a fat chick in thigh highs to me for some reason.

couch-vintage settee- $300 way cool in an entry.

antique couch and chair- $300

antique sofa- $725 you can find these a dime a dozen in atlanta for 1/4 of that price.

victorian antique white sofa- $280 skirt off please.

queen anne sofa- $450 yummy. my favorite. offer half.

your welcome michigan heather.
xo

ms. smart's los angeles craiging

do yourself a favor and go to los angeles craigslist, just for shits and gigggles. it actually kind of pissed me off it was so good. i mean it's still craigslist, and you do have to rummage through a heaping pile of shitfuckstack to get to the awesomeness.

ms. smart (you probs know her from her blog and/or her comments on your blog) asked me for some cool lamps and art storage, here's what she wrote:

"Dang, you are good at that.

I need a cool floor lamp for my living room. What do you think tiger lady? Pasadena, CA (Los Angeles area). I have dark wood, red silk chairs, brown leather. Think urban condo - modern, fancy, artsy, a bit of leopard, French interior kinda. I also need an art area solution. "

here is my inspiration pic (elle decor):

mid century floor lamp- $175 all of these lamps i picked are way cool and would turn a room filled with antiques into a chic and modern space.

brass floor lamps- $25 each or $40 for both personally i think this is about themost ridiculously awesome deal in the history of deals. get them, both! srsly look no further.

mid century pole lamp- $80 good but the ones above are better.

arc floor lamp- $75 pretty cool too!

vintage mid century copper bamboo floor lamp- $150 also good.

wooden asian bowls and stands- $5 how cool is this loot? good for your arty stuff? as i see it they are like pedestals for your paints. give them reverence.


wooden decorative accessories- $18 like cool trays to gather your paints and supplies and keep order among them.

vintage white metal shelves- $350 these are fuckballs expensive. but very cool. baskets don't come with but a few of those wooden things above would be cool.

west elm shelves- $100 also cool. good for a small space.

handmade rustic cabinet and hutch- $250 i thought this was the cat's paws. so unique and a big place to store your stuff. it's handmade!! what better place to store your handmade's. great price too. it's soooo bali.

antique music stand- $150 cute. good for papers and what not.

steel ornate victorian display case- $125 love this. it's steel!! and it's ornate.

vintage metal shelves- $30 i love these mixed in with dark wood floors and rich antiques.

so ms. smart i surely hope i have provided you with some sort of love.
go forth and craig.

courtney's miami craig

let me tell you, miami cragislist is like shopping at your awesome gay uncle's garage sale. in other words it was awesome and kinda easy. especially given what court was after.

"I'm looking for a more grown up, sexy version of the Hollywood regency shtick...less palm beach more sexy. I want this to be a bachelorette cave that makes people want to have a gin and tonic in their best cocktail dresses and be scandalous later. Carrie in SATCs new apt with a Kara Mann edginess. U dig? Thx xo."

i used the images of carrie bradshaw's new apartment and a sexy kara mann bedroom as inspiration. here and here.

i found a lot of stuff that i know court will love and also some things that i thought were really cool and would soften up the modern edge she seeks.

silver leaf dresser- $650 waaay too much money but you could offer half. it is very awesome for you.

heart shaped lucite stool- $85 offer 50. love.

red rattan etagere- $35 great price. not sure how sturdy it is and it could be painted.

mid century lucite and brass table- $125. this is spectacular. offer 85.

hollywood regency king headboard- $100. areyoukiddingme???? i want this. i have a king bed.

pair of lucite end tables- $350. GORGEOUS! offer way less. but i would pay 300.

victorian chair- $145. very sexy if painted shiny black and wearing some gorgeous fabric. pair it with the chair below painted the same but with a different yet similar fabric then throw that brass and lucite table between them. and then consider your pants pooped.

victorian chair- $150. pair it with the above for that sexy edgy kara mann vibe. your new sitting area=dumbsville.

brass and glass bar cart- $159. yes. you get. offer 100.

(above) 4 black lacquer chairs- $160. great for extra seating.

lucite and glass table- $300. sexballs city.

4 regency chairs- $300. offer less. these chairs are unbelievable.

2 peach/coral lamps with lucite base- $50. change the shades or don't. but these are very unique and super sexy against your black wall. peach is going to make a major comeback. wait and see.

faux horn pendant- $75. very cool in an entry or hallway.

lucite rolling stool- $100. offer 50. sorry about all the lucite but there was just so much good lucite!!! and obviously i don't intend for you to ge all of it!!

black lacquered nightstands (2)- $185 OBO. great lines.

black asian lacquer dresser- $125 pretty hot. great under a flatscreen.

vintage brass bamboo base floor lamp- $25 this is a great choice for that area by your bed that's too small for a proper nightstand. this just needs a new shade and some polishing up. super cool.

brass and glass etagere- $85 golden girls chic.

go forth and craig!

julie's raleigh outdoor craig love

happy st. patty's day m effers! i hope you enjoyed celtic thunder as much as i did. i am wearing green cords from madewell, what are you contributing?

lets look at another craigslist challenge. this one comes from julie and she wants outdoor furniture to sit on while she gets drunkcity USA.

here's what she wrote:

Hi MFAMB! I'm a long time reader, but this will be the first time I'm introducing myself. I love seeing the craigslist finds you score in Atlanta and would like to take you up on your challenge of finding good shit on my local craigslist (raleigh.craigslist.org). The number #1 thing I'm looking for right now is furniture for my back porch to hang out/dine/get drunk during the day and in the sunlight. I'm not opposed to painting/refurbishing anything and I'd like to keep it under $300. Also, it must be able to withstand the elements since my porch isn't enlcosed and I don't have storage for the furniture during inclement weather (but I COULD store cushions if I needed to). I feel like I've looked and looked and can't find anything good.

well julie, i have come to your rescue.

here are my finds:
eames era patio furniture- $225 (light blue chair sold) superawesome. offer 175.

white resin rocking chair- $40. offer 25. it's cute. could mix it in with anything.
resin wicker loveseat- $125 paint it white and pair it with the chair above or paint them both deep inky blue and add a pale pink and white striped sunbrella fabric to the cushions.

bench/daybed- $395 this kicks ass. add an outdoor protective varnish like marine varnish and offer half what they're asking. 250 tops. it's way cool.

glass top table- $50 this is super unique. use it as a buffet for an outdoor party. its 50 bucks!!! but it's probs heavy as elephant balls. bring men and a truck.

vintage patio furniture- $180 am i crazy to like this stuff? i do. talk about mid century. you could paint it anything.

table and chairs- $125 the table has great legs. a coat of paint on those chairs and maybe some cushions in a girly fabric would take it up a notch.

custom picnic table- $225 this guy will build you what you want or you can pick one of his many options and he can put an outdoor stain on it. one of a kind shit is cool. he will also deliver for the price of gas.


large outdoor metal table- $125 love it. offer 100. pair it with some of the chairs below.

pottery barn outdoor chairs- $150 (they are selling a table too but it's ugly) the chairs are not though. offer 100. pay 120.

2 wrought iron and leather stools- $25 for both!! get them. these are awesome. great for extra seating. clean up that black leather and paint the bottom white!!! gorgeous. take these indoors for all the time and outside when you are having a party.

6 ft. long rustic bench- $75 could be a coffee table too!! you could cover it with a cute tablecloth or paint it, i would paint it a creamy, milky white.

solid wrought iron table- $40 extra table/seating. offer 20.

bringing it and ching changing it.

andrea's valdosta/albany georgia craigslist finds (where i prove my witchery)

andrea thought for a minute that she could outsmart me. saying this:

Jenny,

My closest craig's city would be either Albany, GA or Valdosta, GA. I challenge you to find anything that doesn't look like it came out of a trailer or have a family of roaches living in it. My point is that craig's list is slim pickings when you live in a small town.

Thanks,

Andrea

so before i looked for her stuff i emailed her and asked if she would drive the 3 hours to atlanta for a great deal. this is what she said:

I would be willing to go to atl for one hell of a bargain. I really need some kind of fab dresser to use as a tv stand in my living room. Would also love to find 2 metal tea carts or narrow shelves to go in my dining room. I am also obsessed with a good chair so any suggestions would be welcomed. I like clean lines but not to modern.

behold my powers:

gentleman's desk- $40 paint this beauty black or gray and outfit it with some sexy hardware. this is a classic desk. sturdy and cool. yes.

2 small black leather chairs- $100 good deal. probs could offer 75 for both.

antique oak dresser- $250. offer 175. it's a great piece. you could modernize it with shiny paint in a bright color and some modern pulls. or like me, strip it to a pale wood tone and wax it up. then put it under your tv next to those modern black leather chairs. it's all about balance.

vintage chair -$25 for 1 or $40 for 2. great chairs. fabric them up in something good:

dresser- $25 another option for under your tv. it's got a more modern feel and they are practically giving it away, but not sure how great it is in person. it's worth checking out. again, paint it shiny and add some sexy chinoiserie hardware.

antique table and chairs- $300. fuck the table, go for those chairs. paint them and add new cushions in a great fabric. those chairs are amazeballs USA.

here are 3 bar/tea carts for you:

tea cart- $20 this is from atlanta craig.

bar cart- $80 also from atlanta craig.

glass and metal bar cart- $45 also atlanta craig.

glass coffee table- $100 this is gorgeous. snatch it up!!!

glass dining room table- $75 this is a GREAT deal. worth the drive to atlanta fo shiz.

wood chair- $100. talk that shit down. it's a good chair. put it in that corner that needs something.

oak breakfast set- $150. the table is fine- the stain is hideous. but my money is on those windsor chairs. classic chairs. paint them.
the majority of this was on the valdosta/albany georgia craigslist. i am telling you when you have super duper fairy glitter running through your veins you can find anything on craigslist.

your welcome andrea.
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amanda's philly craigslist finds

here we are again! farts. you all need to start paying me. that said, this particular challenge was easy peasy japanesey. it comes from amanda of the hilarious blog martinis or diaper genies. srsly, she is way funnier than me AND she's asian. that's a deadly combo of humor and smarts. but i am taller and prettier. here's what she wrote:

challenge
philadelphia

mid century eclectic, with antique stuff that I can paint funny colors.
go.

i emailed her back and asked if she had anything specific in mind. here are her answers:

a full length mirror so i don't have to stand on my toilet

cool art

chachkies

chairs

love seat

awesome

fame and fortune

done. except for the fame and fortune part. i am still looking for that myself, but if i find it i will let you know.

major cool chandelier- $150 could rock in your eclectic mid century mixed with antiques decor. in fact its very elle decor isn't it? and it's hugeballs. big impact for very little money.

full length vanity mirror- $200 but you could probs get it for 75.

60's full length danish modern mirror- $40. whaaa? 40? snatch that up.

adjustable floor lamp- $20 this is very cool and very cheap. plus it's flexible so you could make it do whatever you want.

mid century barcelona lounger- $195 shitballs this rocks. get this and upholster it in something like...

this, put it in your bedroom....and you can finally be my best friend like you have always wanted to be. i mean come on. this is a gorgeous prospect.

green settee- $250. a little pricey but you could probs get it for 150. it's a great in between size and with some killer fabric in say a chevron or big stripe it would be amaze.

4 chinoiserie-esque chairs- $200. great price for 4 chairs that you could paint something delicious.

8 x 10 rug- $200 OBO. never been used! love it.

pair of bamboo chairs-$200. paint these bitches shiny black and add some new fabric on those cushions. dumb.

crate and barrel azure sofa- $800 craigslist pricey but less than half of what was paid. and you could always offer less.

mid century loveseat- ?? they are selling a sofa and loveseat for $350 so you could offer a lot less i'm sure. it has great lines and looks in good structural condition. the retro fabric isn't too bad. but i would def change it.

3 white nesting tables- make an offer. fuck dude, offer them 20 bucks! they're great and maybe you could funk them up with some faux snakeskin or croc paper.

glass and brass coffee table- $195. so good. esp. with that GD blue sofa up there.

blonde danish modern bar cart- $48. i like it as is, but would be beautiful painted as well. and that is a great price.

vintage lucite bar cart/side table- $99 yummy. get it.

this awesome motherfucker was gone this morning!!! sors.

so were these. dying for you.

hollywood regency buffet/sideboard- $150. also a great bar option. or in a hall for linens or in the living room under a small flatscreen or bedroom..paint it and put some different hardware on it.

great chair- $75. a steal. needs a tiny bit of easy lovin.
your welcome.
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