in it's home

Gabriela Eisenhart March 1, 2013

i love when clients send me images of paintings i did for them all hung up in their homes..

amber's client.

christine's house.

alison's client.

jamie's client.

a lady with great taste.

charmaine's home.

more good taste.

and more still.

if you have a painting i did for you all hung up and happy, please send me a pic so i can feature it here.

here are some recent commissions..

want to commission something?

email me.

also-

if you're wondering about my donkey kicked ribs...

i am getting an xray today.

the pain has subsided somewhat but it's still there so i think it's more than a pulled muscle but less than cancer.

have a great weekend!

pain(t) **updates from urgent care

Gabriela Eisenhart February 27, 2013

let me just go ahead and tell you that i got kicked in the left kidney by a horse and that horse is called upward facing dog.

either that or i am in acute kidney failure.

yesterday, mid-day i started feeling said pain and thought...eh..just some soreness from yesterday's yoga but it just kept getting worse.

i can't even take a deep breath ya'll.

what do i do?

heating pad does nothing.

no position is comfortable and if i sneeze i think it would kill me.

advil helped minimally.

is this a chiro job?

a massage job?

help me...it hurts.

here's a diagram to show you internet "doctors" what i am dealing with...

i have painting to do and this is putting a damper on that SUPERFUN job.

besides lower left side pain i am feeling the brain pain of having to make a decision about something hard.

painting out the trim in my living room.

the fact of the matter is this..

i have the most awesome trim in my house.

but i think i need to paint it out in this room for the modern look i am going for.

in fact, i KNOW this is the right choice.

but i am no less terrified.

why?

how stupid is it to be terrified of paint?

look how good it is painted out..

it helps to keep the space modern.

which is exactly what i want to do.

i think the reason i am so scare is there is soooo much of it in the room.

i need to grow a pair.

like this guy..

also i'm dying.

help me.

****ok, so i went to urgent care bc thanks to you i thought i might have a kidney infection.

my pee says there is no infection.

just a muscle spasm.

but it feels like dying.

so now it's just me, some high quality heroin muscle relaxers, 800 mg motrin, moist heat and some soup (and cookies).

happenings

Gabriela Eisenhart February 26, 2013

i finished watching the oscars and have to give a shout out to adele's hair because it was magnificent.

i also have to give a shout out to renee zellweger...

thank you for coming out of retirement with gym hair and klonopin face.

and my jennifer lawrence girl crush is on..and hard.

if you haven't yet..please please please watch this..

speaking of things to watch..

have you all been watching the layover with anthony bourdain?

you should be.

you know how on pinterest you come across recipes that promise to be the best EVER?!?

well, i came across a recipe for gluten free chocolate chip cookies and pinned it to my ever growing list of gluten free foods promising to be the missing link in the ever long search for all things gluten free and delicious.

and to top it all off they didn't look very appetizing..

kind of like vomit muffins.

or cat food discs.

but guess what?

they are delicious.

and take about 5 minutes to make.

minus the 10 minute set time (SUPER important)

and the 11 minute bake time.

i have made these not once, not twice..but three times.

here is the recipe.

and here are my tips...

when you pour the melted butter into the flours you will be like, no way these are going to make cookies.

the recipe says to allow the batter to rest in the fridge for 10 minutes.

DO IT.

it's the only way these cookies work.

the coconut flour needs a little time to absorb the liquid and puff up.

setting it in the fridge assures that the cookies won't spread out to quickly.

just follow the recipe to a T and you won't fail.

and finally...

witching hour on left.

black blue on right.

i am going with black blue.

it's magical in person.

oscars

Gabriela Eisenhart February 25, 2013

if you're like me, and you certainly are, you went to bed at 10:00 bc what the shit was that last night?

here's my 4 cents (2 is not enough to cover my thoughts)..

1. peter brady looks good for his age.

2. in theory he makes a good host but in reality he confused the shit out of everyone.

seth mcfartland is a great voice and comedic writer but lacks the delivery chops.

you gotta land that shit with confindence.

ricky gervais excels where seth fails.

i LIKE when hosts make fun of celebrities. they need to be made fun of. they are WAY too high on themselves and they are swimming around in WAY WAY too much money.

besides a joke is a joke is a joke.

in other words IT'S A JOKE LIGHTEN THE FUCK UP.

but if you can't tell it well then you look like an asshole who hates women or irish people instead of a comedian telling a joke.

that said there is always the uptight idiot who takes shit personally and i have no advice for you because you are beyond logical thinking.

3. and that said..perhaps we need to just keep the oscars classy and good natured.

no crass jokes, no potty humor (gasp), no make out sessions with sally field...you know...old school.

i recall hugh jackman's oscar host post fondly.

i'm pretty sure he didn't make a racist joke.

and he is super easy to look at.

plus you will always win me over with dancing and singing.

which is why the boob song, while utterly retarded, was my favorite seth bit.

i thought it was pretty genius.

4. channing tatum looks like a sexy thumb.

5. more channing tatum doing things please, can channing tatum host?

6. the musical numbers, while random, were my favorite parts of the night.

i don't care how off-key russell crowe was.

make fun of him and i'll cut you!

(russell: CALL ME L8TER)

overall the show was just...weird.

i think whatever happens next year they need to find the right person and stick with them.

part of the reason billy crystal was so awesome was he had the chance to up his game and top himself every year. and he always did.

we need a new billy crystal.

not a duo, not a trash talker, not a random face (seth) with great writing skills.

anyway...

onto what's really important.

the fashity fashion.

let's start with the best..

you could pick it apart for sure bc it is totally dynasty ring master..

but it's a departure for her (hello one shoulder) and she looks FUCKING STUN-NING!

completely perfect.

she just looked lovely.

the dress had enough edge with it's crinkly quilty-ness to keep it out of princess town.

she's never looked better.

head to toe winning.

she looks amazing.

i LOVE her dress.

so age appropriate and so sexy!

stop. it.

the cut and fit of this on her is genius.

onto the bad...

too much dress for her.

she looks like she's trying too hard and she looks uncomfortable.

i feel like i've seen this dress a zillion times.

she looked better at the vanity fair party.

what the shit is this old lady dress doing on this tiny little bumble bee of a girl?

that hair too.

this dress makes her look enormous.

what is it, jersey?

flannel?

she may as well have worn pajamas.

but the hair sucks the most.

seriously?

THIS is your oscar dress for your first ever oscar win??

it's an apron in a most unappealing color.

plus is she even aware she has boobs?

doesn't she wear this every year?

same hair, same necklace, same dress?

seriously...doesn't she?

she's so fucking boring.

yeah yeah..whatver.

if you're going to go to all the effort of wearing a fancy dress, putting on some make up and making a bird's nest out of your hair you could at least allow a stylist to do that for you.

helena bonham carter is a stunningly beautiful english rose flower woman..

and she always looks like tim burton's corpse bride.

i'd like to see her look like an elegant, sexy, corpse bride.

speaking of corpse bride..