day 13

 

so on wednesday morning i put fiona in the car and drove her to school.  

we were a little later than usual bc after the holidays who knows what fucking time it is let alone what day..

but when we pulled up to the school not one single car was there. (wow we were REALLY late)

the cones weren't out. (we were now in the getting written up zone)

no sign of life. (wait a minute....)

doors locked. (fuck self)

 

 

SINCE WHEN IS WINTER BREAK SIXTEEN DAYS LONG?!

lucky me i work from home but what do you 9-5 ers do with your kid at these times?

 

the christmas presents have lost their luster and i am getting screamed at for just about everything. 

 

yesterday's walk in the freezing cold wasn't such a great idea..

 

 

 

until we got to the playground...

 

 

thank god for playgrounds.

 

and wine.

 

 

and television..

 

like..

 

MILLION DOLLAR DOUCHERATORS..

how many times did you choke back vomit when JAM talked about how hard it was to decorate entirely from catalogs?

 

but then you were clapping like a pre teen mom at a one direction concert when you saw that shit go down west elm style...

 

 

 

but then you vommed again when he "just had to" buy that 10,000 bench.

 

apparently the word "entirely" as in "decorate my house entirely from catalogs" really means "except when you see a local boat for sale, then nail that to the wall in the corner of my great room.  or missoni chairs, buy those too".

 

in his defense...he's totally right.

you can't decorate a house entirely from catalogs and think it's not going to look like it's been decorated entirely from catalogs.

you gotta have a few antiques floating around in there to make it special..

but a 10,000 dollar bench is face punching territory.

 

and as for those chairs- he could have bought cheap-ish directors chairs and had them recovered in a missoni look-a-like fabric for a lot less. 

 

but whatever,  these people have a house on the ocean in nantucket...what the hell were they doing decorating from catalogs anyway?

 

OH!! i know!!!!

....if they used west elm in the show west elm would pay for everything.

 

got it. 

rich people are the luckiest.

 

 

hey west elm...

i will decorate my house using ONLY west elm products and document it here on my blog if you pay for it.

 

 

moving on..

 

because we all need to see this again today..

 

 

so much has happened!!

jude is judy again and she's getting a taste of her own medicine.

homegirl got the juice last night and hard.

now she's in one flew over the cuckoos nest territory.

eunice is dead as is dr. arden.

grace is alive again and pepper is in charge.

 

this show lost all it's scary factor and just moved into hilariously nuts.

 

 

also started watching this show..

 

why is all tv so intense?

 

whatever happened to touched by an angel?

 

 

it is really no wonder people murder each other these days with such ease.

 

AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!

 

QUICK! QUICK!!

kitty paws KITTY PAWS!!!!

 

 

 

baby panda waving..BABY PANDA WAAAVVVING!!!!!!

 

 

whew..

that's better.

 

 

one more for the road..

 

 

 

 

baby animals make everything better. 

 

 

 

 

2013- here's what i'm thinking...

bet you weren't expecting that, were you?

 

new year, new look. 

new everything.

change is awesome.

 

i plan on changing the look of the blog on a regular(ish) basis. 

i figure we're all serial decorators here, we can handle it. 

 

big ups to susie, my minty pal, for putting this look together for me.

she is really awesome at blog design among many other things.

and just an awesome friend in general.

 

 

ok, why red?

well, red is the color of the root chakra..

just kidding...

we tried a bunch of different colors as backgrounds with various paintings..

and this was our favorite.

simple as that.

 

it's going to change though.

with new paintings and new color inspiration.

so if red makes your butthole cringe, no worries..

it's going to change many times over so i am sure emerald (everyone's new favorite color) is in your future.

 

 

 

 

anyway..

moving on to what i am thinking for 2013...

 

understated, casual sophistication. 

 

 

 

repeat...

understated, casual SOPHISTICATION.

 

always and forever but with less diamond pattern and more fringe.

 

 

 

clean lines mixed with...

 

 

 

nubby textures.

 

 

 

 

 

 

a few pieces of amazing furniture rather than a room full of who cares furniture.

 

 

 moody and casual.

MUCH less fuss.

black and white art.

 

 

 

colorful, vintage pottery.

 

or collections of your choice. 

 

 

1 big statement art piece rather than several little groupings to make a statement. 

also..

original art.

 

"don't buy copies of art. if you can't afford the real thing, go for a walk and find a stone that looks as beautiful as a brancusi sculpture. you can find amazing things in nature."- axel vervoordt.

 

 

mid century fiber art.

i am slightly obsessed.

 

 

folk art.

 

particularly southern folk art.

 

folk art tells a story and it's so colorful and beautiful.

i want to see people buy art because they are moved by it.

not because it matches their decor.

 

 

and what could be cooler than a folksy, country quilt paired with modern furniture and lighting?...

 

see also rag rugs.

 

 

ultimately i think i am ready for a large paring down process.

less stuff.

 

clean surfaces.

fewer pillows.

simple lines.

homey and cozy,

but with sophistication.

 

it is so.

 

 

 

what day is it?

 

 

 

as if christmas weren't enough of a gut shanker...

fiona's birthday is on new year's eve.

so to say i am pooped at just about this time every year is an understatement.

 

 

the slumber party tent this year was just our camping tent with fiona's curtains slung over the top.

 

and a pink ikea lantern inside..

 

 

super easy and effective.

 

 

fiona inherited a dollhouse from a family friend and i painted it black with white trim.

 

inspired by..

 

 

 

 

right??

 

plus it looks great on display in the house.

 

there is still the whole matter of the inside though.

 it's vintage so the shell has been gutted.

the decorating will take some time.

i need wallpaper scraps y'all.

send me some.

 

you guys, hot toddies are legit.

first of all i had never had a hot toddy before,

i am not a liquor drinker-

but i did some internet research and bulleit bourbon is not only smooth and vanilla-y, it's downright delicious!

i did some more internet research and combined a few recipes i found for hot toddies..

 

here's my recipe for the ultimate cold zapping mother fucker of a hot toddy..

 

 first draw an extremely hot bath (not organ boiling or skin melting but probably hot enough to redden your hiney)..

add 2 cups of epsom salts.

1 cup of baking soda.

1 tsp of powdered ginger (the kind you get in the spice isle).

 

while this is going down go and chop 1 thumb-sized piece of fresh ginger.

put it in a tea cup.

put 1 1/2 cups of water on to boil.

put one cold and flu season tea bag in your cup.

i use this kind- but you can use any tea you want. 

i just happened to have had it and it was at night so i didn't want any caffeine.

next add a generous pinch of red pepper flakes. 

you can use cayenne but the red pepper flakes are more mellow while still giving you the much needed heat.

next add a teaspoon or more to taste of RAW honey.

when the water has reached an almost boil add it to the cup.

then add your jigger of bourbon.

i used 2 teaspoons, but a jigger is about an ounce.

you can use more if you want ya filthy animal.

last step is to squeeze the juice of half a lemon in the cup.

now go sit in that hot bathtub for 40 minutes (adding more hot water as needed) while you sip that tea.

 

i am telling you..

just what the doctor (me) ordered.

 

 

 

 

see ya on the flerpity flerp florp.

 

 

 

 

christmas tidings and a winner!

 

the ruffin-costello's surely know how to make pretty christmas decor.

simple and effective.

(although there is nothing simple about that mirror and i want it)

 

 

 

and now for the winner of the greatest christmas present ever....

 

 

 

it's EMILY V of CHEZ V!

 

she will be receiving said gift sometime in the near future.

 

merry merry christmas to all you christmas celebrating folk.

 

please eat and drink responsibly.

also don't forget the magic for the kids.

christmas is all about the magic.

so don't fucking ruin it for anyone by being a dick.

 

 

pine scented farts,