its. getting. far far worse.

i have become a vampire. i haven't killed anyone (yet) or anything like that. but i haven't been sleeping. seriously, since last friday sleep has evaded me like my undead friends. not even sleeping aids will help. natural or narcotic. there is a reason for this..several really. said reasons stem from the same source...books...you MIGHT know of them...the twilight series?

it started out innocently enough. the first book, twilight sucked me in fairly quickly but still i guess i wasn't as "invested" in the characters as i would eventually become. toward the end of it though, i was racing for my keys to drive to the closest barnes and noble for the next book in the series, new moon. now THIS is where it has become...well...PAINFUL to read. if you haven't read further than the first book..STOP READING HERE AND NOW!!!!! let me first inform those of you that don't know, i am 39 years old. not 19, not even 25....THIRTY NINE. and a mother. whose mothering has gone by the wayside in lieu of too much reading during the day. then at night the reading continues. and the material is such an adrenaline rush that i can't get to sleep. first of all i can't stop reading and then by that point its like 1:30 and then i can't fall alseep because i am too amped up!!! the story is almost too much for me to handle. why?? because of this guy right here:ok, so i OBVIOUSLY don't have to tell you that the guy is good-looking. no. i do not. but it's not really HIM..rob pattinson..it's edward cullen that we all love. is it not? and at this point in new moon i think i keep reading so that i can get to the point where they are together!! its KILLING me. really. all reality has gone out the window. i have reverted back to when i was a teenager and actually believed that i would marry roger taylor from duran duran. this would all be much easier to bear if i could just sleep at night. but i can't i am haunted. it's just so hard to keep away...to find out what happens next....to see if they...you know....do it!!! so much so that i think i may have to take a break from all this vampire romance after new moon is over. i just hope i can. are there any twerds out there that can offer help? without giving anything away of course. even if you wanted to just air YOUR grievances..that would be helpful.