happy presents for poor people day!

isn't that what boxing day is?

the day when rich english people would give their servants leftover food and shit?

here, have our meat scraps and a few pieces of myrrh and some pine needles from our tree..

it's christmas afterall!

now go iron my newspaper.

 

in honor of boxing day i give you my inspiration file scraps...

shit that i wish i could shove in a box and leave outside your quarters with a pair of my shoes for shining.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

those are some ridiculous scraps.

 

 

happy boxing day.

and happy birthday mom.

 

 

 

 

we wish you a merry christmas!!

 

merry christmas and happy hanukkah to all of MFAMB's devoted readers.

thank you for making me a part of your day.

 

 

**beauty note (and i use that word verrry loosely)..absolutely zero effort was made on my part to look in any way cute or clean for that matter...and at my age, effort is what keeps you from looking like kim richards' toilet baby.

 

see u on the flippity flip.

 

 

american stupid story

if you're asking me-

and you know that you are..

i say this finale was a healping pile of bull crap.

 

ESPECIALLY since i now know this:

 

With American Horror Story‘s first season resting in peace,  Ryan Murphy is turning his attention to the serial thriller’s second act.

The show’s cocreator confirms that Season 2 will be “radically different” from Season 1. That means a new setting/locale and a (mostly) new cast. 

“The second season of the show will [feature] a brand new home or building to haunt,” Murphy said in a conference call with reporters on Thursday. ”It will also have a new overriding theme.”

And in an unprecedented twist for an ongoing series, some current castmembers will return — but they’ll be playing new characters. (Murphy confirmed that current leads Connie Britton and Dylan McDermott will not be back, at least not as series regulars.) ”There will be familiar faces and some new faces,” said Murphy. “People that are coming back will be playing completely new characters… Getting to tell a different aspect of what an American horror story can be [every season] is fascinating.”

Murphy added that he’s currently in talks with a few members of the Season 1 cast to return full time, but he declined to name names. An official announcement about the new ensemble and storyline will be made in February. In the meantime, Murphy offered this tantalizing tease: “There’s a clue in the last three episodes where we say what the second season will be.”

 

 

hmmm...

ok.

i see that that could be interesting,

but like this last episode it means i could give two shits about what happens to these people.

to me, a series has characters that you either love or hate, but regardless of your feelings toward them, you CARE what happens to them.  when that is gone, so is my attention.

 

this finale had it's "oh shit" moments...but when it was all said and done..

i could have cared less.

it had me feeling like i was part of an experiement.

like i was a member of a test audience.

in a sense i guess we all were..

 

it was funny for 2 seconds to watch viv and ben "kill" each other but it was kind of also like watching an improv scene that was going really well, take a sudden turn for the worse with someone's use of the word 'pussyfart' thus making everyone cringe and want their money back.

(let me just say that i might know a little somethin' about that)

 

so with this idea that each season brings a new house and a new set of people it also brings with it the fact that at the end of each season you know that everyone is going to die?

where's the fun in that?

how do you successfully get there and still maintain a sense of tension and devotion and/or sympathy?

 

perhaps...and this may be wishful thinking, but perhaps IF someone like jessica lange came back to play a different character that was maybe the victim it would be like she was getting what was coming to her in a karmic/reincarnated kind of way..

that maybe these characters come back for a second chance as someone else and to hopefully redeem themselves..?

for example, ben comes back and gets cheated ON?

or is that too easy and stupid for words?

 

maybe ryan murphy just needs to come over here and run all of his ideas past me..

 

what are your thoughts on this?

 

either way...

i feel stupid discussing the finale in recap form, because...umm...WHO CARES??!!

 

 

i mean my first thought was, is 'mike the baby' viv and tate's?  or is it really ben and viv's?

will we ever know?

in any event that fucker murdered consuela with his tiny child hands and then smiled like he was jeff dahmer.

 

and what was all that end of days talk?

what about the pope's secret box? 

 

and what about constance's 4th child?

eh?

 

and all that business at the beginning..

why did we need to see ben pleading with viv to come see the house?

it was like going back bc you forgot your keys and then remembered that keys are dumb.

it just felt superfluous.

 

it was unexpected that ben was going to be murdered by hayden and her crew..

but now that i know the big payoff is just that they are finally happy together around their stupid christmas tree..

how did they get that tree anyway?

they can't leave MH and drive to home depot or anything.

anyway..lame payoff is what i am trying to say.

 

 

so this is where we all are..

 

viv and violet plead with ben to leave and try to give the baby a normal life somewhere..

ben wants to die and leave the baby with the sister.

ben gets his wish only the sister must have shown up and then bc no one was there was probably like..

"oh well.  see ya later" ???????

travis slashes hayden's throat and hands the baby to constance.

she then tells the cops that she thinks violet must have run off with the baby.

maybe this is what they told this sister too.

these cops are the dumbest worst cops in the world.

some latino couple buy the house.

viv's dog became a fraggle.

tate tries to kill the new kid.

the whole ghost gang work as a team to get rid of the new owners.

it is super dumb.

and very much like what it's like walking through the netherworld haunted house on halloween.

some more shit happens.

tate and ben discuss shit.

who cares.

constance gives an oscar worthy performance from the chair of a beauty salon..

something about her whole life leading up to this point.

what?

again...WHAT??

i mean i get what she's trying to say but it was all just leading up to basically nothing.

 

so. um. yeah.

there it is.

 

what did you all think?

 

 

marcy farts and thaddeus sharts,

i tried throwing croutons at it..

but my pesky blog problem wouldn't go away.

i even called the squarespace support team and yelled 'GO AWAY!!'

did not work. 

 

apparently some of you were seeing an "MFAMB DOWN" warning every time you tried to access my blog,

yet some of you had no problems.

turns out i hadn't paid the domain site's annual 20 dollar fee. 

seems their notices were going straight to my spam folder.

so i paid it and then was told it could take 24 hours to fix.

was also told that i should tell all of you to reboot and/or clear your cache.

 

so i said.."YOU tell them!"

and then i punched everyone in the kidneys.

 

anyway..

that's what the problem was.

 

if you're reading this then all is well.

if not..well...that is sucky for us all.

 

moving on.

 fiona's 7th birthday is around the corner (dec. 31st to be exact) and i have never had a proper party for her.

this year it is going to be pretty special..

3 of her little girl school pals are coming over for a trip to fernbank museum (super fun with lots of cool activities), then to tacqueria del sol for delicious tacos, then to star provisions for cupcakes (the best cupcakes i've ever tasted).

then it's home for a slumber party.

but not just any slumber party....

 

mike and i (mike only) will be constructing an indoor tent of bohemian spectacularness.

the idea came from the movie The Holiday..

you remember..

the little girls' super special tent in their room with the christmas lights and cut-out stars?

 

this one..

 

they will sleep in it!

 

i have gathered a few tent-y images over the past few weeks for inspiration..

 

(mike..pay attention to all of these scenarios..

and when you go to construct it, make that shit wide enough for sleeping and activities.

the blog world is watching and waiting.

so it better be fucking magical!)

 

 

 

 

yes. there needs to be a tv and cats. 

 

and pom pom fringe and ikat.

 

 

 

make one of these for me please.

 

that is major.

 

homeless chic.

 

 

 bed tents are fun too.

 

 

yessss.

 

yesssss.

 

personal.

 

wow.

 

simple yet effective.

 

 

 

this is pretty great.

 

crazy awesome.

 

 

ok then.

 

reach for the stars!!